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Late one night a robber wearing a mask stopped a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded. Scandalized, the man replied, "You cant do this Im a US Congressman!" "Oh! In that case," smiled the robber, "Give me MY money!"
"Mom can I get twenty bucks?", "Does it look like I am made of money?", "Well isn't that what M.O.M stands for?"
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.